The Weaving

 I want so desperately to live a life of meaning. I want to leave behind me deep roots that intertwine and spead out far and wide and then reconnect. I want to leave a legacy that is strong in Faith and Hope, Love and Truth. Someday when someone mentions Great-great-great Grandma Leigh Anne they will say, who was she? They won't know me. But I know them, because I've already prayed for them; For their lives, and their legacy that they will leave. I've already prayed for their roots to connect to mine and to keep the foundation of our family steadfast and immovable.  They won't know me. But Lord how I love them. 

Part of my desire to gain deep roots is for my own growth. I desire to grow. To become better then I was a year ago. To learn from my mistakes, and for heaven sakes to stop making the same ones over and over! Man, oh man, do I fail. I fail a lot. But I'm trying to love big and to show my children that the world although huge, is also quite small. No matter where we are from or what we look like, deep down we all want realitvily the same thing... to love and be loved, to make meaningful connections, to be seen. God knows this. He knows what we need even before we need it. The way he weaves our lives together is a beautiful work of art.  

It's difficult to see it in the moment, the weaving that God is doing.  At times I think that He's forgotten about me and my heart.  I pray things like, "you said in your word that if I ask it will be given and that if I delight in You, the desires of my heart will be give. But yet here I am, in the same spot, praying for the same thing over and over. Do you even see me Lord?" I know He's weaving things together, its just hard to see in the moment. I'm not forgotten, and neither are you. The weaving is happening although it's difficult to see. 

This summer I took the kids half way across the country. By myself. During a pandemic. At a time in our nation's history when our cities were being burned down and they weren't safe to travel though.  All because I want our family roots to be strong for generations to come. And because I wanted to see Mount Rushmore. We took several days to get from Virginia to South Dakota, with many stops in between.  We passed over the Eastern Continental Divide and the Great Mississippi River. We visited my grandfathers grave in Greenup Illinois and also President Lincolns tomb in Springfield Illinois.  We passed mountains and prairies. We ate at mom and pop shops for dinner and also gas stations when there was nothing else around. We took a scheduled trip to stay the night at the home where The Feild of Dreams movie was filmed (a dream come true!). And we made many impromptu stops to see some road side attractions (we actually saw the worlds largest popcorn ball!) All along God was weaving our story and strengthening our roots, but we didn't see it then.  

As we drove through Ohio and Michigan and Iowa we noticed beautiful art work on many of the barns and homes. Someone even made a comment that they looked like quilts. After an easy Google search we found out they are in fact called Barn Quilts. They are painted either on wood and then hung on the barns or painted directly on the barn itself. They varied in size, color and patterns, but all were gorgeous. It became a thing on our trip, to look out the window and call out when you spotted a new barn quilt! 

Seeing all the barn quilts consistently reminded us of my mom. She has taken up quilting in the last few years. She makes beautiful quilts for everyone she knows. She always puts thought into the patterns that she's putting together for whoever she's gifting it to. It takes lots of time and patience on her part. She's even taken my kids one on one and helped them create their own quilt. In fact, every person who is currently asleep in this house is covered by a quilt from Grandma. That's a beautiful legacy. 

During our trip we decided Grandma needed a barn quilt for her sewing room. And while we were at it we were going to make one for my inlaws new barn as well. It would be a beautiful Christmas gift that we all could be apart of! After reading an artical on the origans of the barn quilt we quickly realized that our own family home would need one as well. See, the barn quilt isn't just beautiful, its meaningful.  It started in Adams Ohio as a way for a lady named Donna Sue Groves to honor her mother. Her Mother was an avid quilter and so to honor her she painted the side of her tobacco barn in one of her mothers favorite patterns. The neighbors liked it and started to paint their barns as well. Now they are all over barns and homes. 

Since the idea was that it should be a family pattern we wanted to make the same gift for each woman in the family. We chose a red, white and blue theme to honor my mother in law as these are her favorite colors. We chose a star patten because my mothers favorite quilt patterns are stars. I logged into pintrest and found a pattern I liked. Our family officially had a new quilt pattern, one I haphazardly picked off of an image I found on pintrest. 

After a little advice from my crafty friend on how to get started, the kids and I painted. And painted and painted.  We painted lots of little triangles. We painted until our backs hurt from leaning over and our toes were numb from cold. We painted while singing along to music. And while I tried to answer the kids deep questions like, "do you think we'll get this done in time?" It was a beautiful process of time spent together and trying something new. 

But it wasn't until December 23 when all the paint was dry and the project was over that I saw the weaving that God had been doing this whole time. 

The weaving started with the crazy desire I had to take my kids to see a big ol' rock  8 states away during the craziest year our country has had in a life time. He weaved during our drive and during the project making. I've realized through this past year, that God is always weaving in our lives, even when it doesn't seem like it.

See, the pattern I chose on a whim is called a 'Carpenters Wheel.' I didn't realize it at the time of selection, only on December 23 when I decided I'd type up a little note to go with the quilt to explain what it is and why we did it. We have several carpenters in the family. Two by trade: my husband and my father in law and one by hobby: my dad can make anything! In wanting to honor the women in my family, God was also weaving it so that all the men would be honored as well. The Carpenters Wheel is an old pattern, one whos roots run deep in our country. This pattern is connected to the slaves. Many of the slaves had a rock solid faith in Jesus. He was their Master Carpenter, a truth I desire to leave for our family; Jesus is the Master Carpenter of our lives. The slaves used this pattern as a secondary symbol of their way to freedom via the underground rail road. Many escaped by wagon (at least part way) while following the Northern Star to freedom, in Ohio. The place where the barn quilt was born and where we first noticed the quilts some 200+ years later. 

God is constantly weaving our lives together for both our good and for his. Its only in the looking back that we see all the thought and kindness He put into it all along. I pray that we, my kids and I, always remember that God is working and that we will pause long enough to see all He's done for us. 

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28